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News
Bruce Banner Reveals His Secret To Becoming Hulk Is That He's Always Angry At The Jews
1+ hour, 23+ min ago (44+ words) NEW YORK, NY — Over the weekend, Dr. Robert Bruce Banner shared a little insight into how he was able to maintain some semblance of control over his transformation into the Incredible Hulk by confirming a deep, personal secret: he's always…...
Tucker Carlson Tells Wife That Israel Must Have Planted All Those Dirty Dishes In The Sink
1+ week, 6+ day ago (29+ words) WOODSTOCK, ME — Podcast host Tucker Carlson reportedly deflected blame over dirty dishes left in his kitchen sink on Tuesday, notifying his wife that they were placed there by Israel....
Middle East Expanded To Include Michigan
2+ week, 5+ day ago (30+ words) DETROIT, MI — Following the Senate primary victory won last night by Abdul El-Sayed, an official announcement was issued that the Middle East had expanded to include the state of Michigan....
Democrats Celebrate El-Sayed Victory By Firing AK-47s Into The Air
2+ week, 5+ day ago (168+ words) DETROIT, MI — Following the controversial candidate's primary win in last night's Michigan Senate primary, joyous Democrats celebrated Abdul Al-Sayed's victory by firing AK-47s into the air. The primary win, which now sends radical Muslim Al-Sayed on to the general election…...
James Talarico Tells Us His 9 Favorite Bible Verses
3+ week, 1+ hour ago (43+ words) You may think you know the Bible, but boy does Texas Senate candidate James Talarico have news for you. There are so many incredible truths hidden in Scripture that Talarico has discovered, and it's his great delight to share those…...
To Fight Antisemitism, Mamdani Announces Mandatory 'Safety Camps' For Jewish Residents
3+ week, 4+ day ago (26+ words) NEW YORK, NY — Mayor Zoran Mamdani already made good on his pledge to combat antisemitism, as on Thursday he introduced mandatory "safety camps" for Jewish residents....
Mamdani Tries To Catch Netanyahu With Trap Labeled 'Free Bagels"
3+ week, 5+ day ago (39+ words) WASHINGTON, D.C. — Vowing to do everything in his power to execute the ICC arrest warrant for Israeli Prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu, Mayor Zohran Mamdani set fresh, free bagels outside the Capitol to lure Netanyahu into a clever trap....
Mamdani Condemns The Rise In Violence Against Jews Since He Declared War On Them
1+ mon, 5+ hour ago (25+ words) NEW YORK, NY — After personally declaring war on the Jewish people, Mayor Zohran Mamdani issued a forceful condemnation of the rise of violence against Jews....
New Yorker Being Stabbed On Street Corner Glad To Know Mamdani Focused On Bringing Netanyahu To Justice
1+ mon, 23+ hour ago (39+ words) NEW YORK, NY — As a mugger repeatedly stabbed him on a Manhattan street corner, local resident Ethan Wallace took comfort in the knowledge that Mayor Zohran Mamdani remained laser-focused on bringing Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to justice....
Unable To Arrest Netanyahu, Mamdani Takes Down Bibi With Vicious Diss Track
1+ mon, 2+ day ago (41+ words) NEW YORK, NY — After coming to the sobering realization he has no authority to arrest a world leader, Mayor Zoran Mamdani reportedly released an epic hip hop diss track designed to get Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu shaking in his…...